November 5, 2009

Second Day After Hospital

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There is smoke coming out of the china cabinet!  You had better wash that bedspread, there is dirt all over it.   Is that cat real?  The cat question was a bit encouraging since she did not simply assume that it was real.

She accepted my offer to feed her when she just couldn’t seem to negotiate her bowl of “Little Bites” shredded wheat.  She had managed most of the yogurt on her own.  She again had trouble getting the straw to work as I tried to get her to finish the Miralax in water.  That is one of the most important items in her medication regimen.  At first she wanted to drink without the straw, but there was no way to get her head erect enough for the water to make it in her mouth.  In the hospital, when she was most disconnected at night, she couldn’t manage to suck on the straw, but blew through it instead.

There have been some moments of lucid interactions.  As she was lying down for a nap (about an hour after getting up), she mentioned lisiening to the “radio” meaning the book on CD that we were listening to on the trip.

By the way, she did sleep better after the applesauce last night.  It is a good thing.  I was running out of patience with the constant needs every few minutes.  There were more times up throughout the night, but there was enough time between them to get some sleep. She did get up pretty early this morning.

I am starting this post early in the day in hopes that I can get to bed earlier tonight.  Of course, my hope is that Mary Ann will be able to get to sleep at a reasonable hour and stay asleep other than a few trips to the commode during the night tonight.

It is now mid-afternoon.  It continues to be a very difficult day.  After her nap, during which I wrote the paragraphs above, we attempted lunch.  There was a piece of Glory Days’ Pizza left from yesterday.  That is her favorite.  I cut it up for her, and she managed a few bites of it with her fork.  Normally, she has no trouble eating small pieces of pizza with a fork.  Finally, I needed to help her. As she had yesterday, she tried to take a drink of Pepsi and set the cup down on top of the pizza on her plate, seemingly unaware that she was doing so.

She ate a few bites of her favorite green Jello, Cool Whip and cottage cheese salad that Mary brought yesterday.  After a two or three spoonfuls she was done.  I offered her a chocolate chip cookie.  She could not negotiate holding it and getting it to her mouth.  I helped her eat half the cookie.

We drove over to Doug and Marikay’s so that I could get a much needed haircut.  She sat with her head down during that time.  When we drove back by the coffee shop, I offered to use a buy one get one free Dairy Queen Blizzard coupon.  She just couldn’t answer intelligibly.  I concluded that she did not want any.  She would not have been able to handle eating it at the DQ, but we could have brought them home.

Moments ago, she wanted to go to the bedroom for some reason of which I was not aware.  When we got there, she wanted to get dressed for bed and was irritated that I didn’t realize what she thought was obvious.  I explained that it was only 3:30pm, and she recognized that it would be too soon to go to bed.

She is now listening to the book on CD that we started on our trip to Hot Springs.  What a dramatically different place we are now, less than a week from the time we were enjoying there.  I just asked if she had any pain or anything was hurting.  She said clearly that she was not hurting in any way.  Her head remains hanging, but she seems to be awake.  I don’t know if she is able to follow the book, but at least at the moment she is remaining in the chair.

I continue to hope that at some point she will snap out of it.  Right now, we would not be able to manage going out to eat in a restuarant, one of our main treats.  This is a whole new place in this trek, a place we would rather not be.

So far this is a pretty distressing day.  She is lying down again.  It is about 4:45pm.  I asked her earlier if it would be okay for us to go to the Parkinson’s Support Group tonight.  She connected with the question and said it would be.  Then a while later she fell while I was on two phone calls, one a survey from our Financial folks on the land line and another on the cell phone from our Son who is on vacation with his family in Colorado.  They had just seen an American Bald Eagle as they were driving along.  She decided she did not want to go to the Support Group meeting.  She said she needed to lie down.  There had apparently been lots of drainage from her mouth the last time she was napping.  I hadn’t noticed just how much it was earlier.  I changed the bed and have her bedding and pillow in the washing machine at the moment.

I am writing lots today, I suppose on account of the need just to talk about what it going on.  This is a new level of need.  At moments like this there is a sense of isolation that comes, recognizing that even with all the support we have from so many wonderful people, ultimately we are on our own as we deal with this.  No one can do it for us.  Others have lives full of needs that they must deal with.

I am, of course, confident of the Lord’s Presence.  Even the Lord experienced a sense of isolation.  It is helpful to recognize that kinship.

On a lighter note, I forgot to spring the live trap this morning after there was no raccoon to be found in it.  A squirrel managed to trip it while foraging for seed that had fallen into the trap.  Is he going to have a story to tell!  He moved like lightning when I opened the door to the trap.

There may be more to tell as the evening wears on, but I will post this now and write more later or tomorrow.

Addendum: Mary Ann got up from her third nap today just long enough to change into her pajamas.  The sheets needed to be changed again on account of the drainage from her mouth.  The washer and dryer are getting a workout.  Logic says that tonight will be a restless night since there were three naps today.  I guess my hope is that she is sleeping off the confusion and will soon return to normal. 

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

November 5, 2009

Day After Hospital Stay

Posted by PeterT under Daily Challenges, Help from Others, Meaningful Caregiving, Practical Tools for Coping | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |
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This has been something of an odd day.  Mary Ann woke up seeming fairly alert. Very soon, she shifted to a minimally responsive mode.  For much of the day, her head hung down on her chest.  She seemed ready to roll forward out of the transfer chair.  The bath aid when she was here, Volunteer Margaret (our Parish Nurse) when she was there or I needed to hold her shoulders up to keep her from going over.

She had a routine Mammogram this afternoon.  It was quite a struggle for two techs to get her positioned and hold her up for the x-rays.

She did a little better after a mid-afternoon nap, but resumed the head down position again after a bit.  Supper was a challenge for her, but she did get a fair amount eaten.

The hallucinations have continued.  I have been back and forth a number of times as I have been trying to write this post.  For the most part, she is saying things that don’t really make any sense.  She starts to say something and then stops, apparently losing track of it or recognizing that it makes no sense.  This has been one of the more challenging times in our journey.

I recognize the head on the chest problem from many of the posts of those in the caregiving spouses of those who have Lewy Body Dementia online support group.  Again, I am hoping that this is just a temporary dip into the Parkinson’s Disease Dementia.  Since we live so close to the boundary between lucidity and confusion, there is always a fear that we will move over that line permanently.  This particular type of dementia, is very unpredictable.  People can move in and out of lucidity and functionality seemingly at random.

There have been only minutes between needs for the last hour or so.  The last trip was for another visit to the commode, just five minutes after the previous trip to the commode.  As we were taking care of that, she asked if we were going home.  I said that we were home and pointed out her quilt hanging on the wall in the bedroom.  That seemed to satisfy her for the moment that she was in her own bed.

It is these times of utter confusion that are among the very hardest for me to handle.  The constant needs that cannot be satisfied since either the words make no sense or what she sees has no substance are very wearing.  Right now it appears that this will be another sleepless night filled with constant frustration.  Then again, maybe not.  The signs are not good at the moment.

Another trip to help her sit up — lots of words that made no sense.  She did agree that she wanted to go back to bed.  We will see how many minutes pass until her next need to get up for something indiscernible.

Five more minutes, another trip to the commode.  This time she wanted something to eat.  She decided to go to the table for a snack container of applesauce.  She took my arm to walk (our usual pattern), then she wanted to continue with the walker (very difficult for her to handle), then she recognized that she needed the wheels (transfer chair), and finally we made it to the table.  All those changes happened in the span of about twenty feet from where we started at the bed to the table.

She usually feeds herself when she has the applesauce, but that wasn’t working for her tonight.  I offered and she chose to have me feed her.  After some difficulty with her trying to get something off the bed, something that was not there (didn’t I see that pile of whatever it was), she is now back in bed for how long — I don’t know.  It is about 11:30pm.  She said that Zandra would soon be here.  Zandra is the bath aide who comes in the morning two days a week.  Zandra was here this morning.

She seems to be stirring again.  Let’s see what it is this time.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

November 4, 2009

Home From The Hospital.

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Finally!  We came home around 3:30pm today.  While the staff at the hospital was wonderful, and Mary Ann had excellent care, the dementia has increased dramatically.  Physically, she is fine.  We are back to normal, riding the margin between heart issues and Autonomic Nnervous System issues (fainting due to sudden drops in blood pressure).  It is not, of course, where we would choose to be if we had a choice, it is just what is so.

From the very first sleepless night, the first night we were there, the decline has been steady.  Last night was terribly difficult.  I put up the rails on the bed so that she would not get up and try to walk by herself on a very slippery, very hard floor.  She just could not accept that the catheter allowed her to stay in bed rather than head to the bathroom.  She saw people and animals and messes here and there.  Today she described in detail a busy cluster of bees on the floor at some time during the night.

I sat beside her on her bed for fifteen minutes to a half hour a number of times during the night.  At one point when she was awake, in the middle of the night, I checked my watch to see how much time there was between the need for me to get up and respond to her or help her.  The time was usually between ninety seconds and two minutes.

I realized that if we were required to stay another night, I would need to arrange for a paid companion so that I could get some sleep.  The constant nighttime needs are more than I can handle and remain rational, patient and helpful, after just two or three nights like last night.

Talking with the doctors helped clarify just how important it was to get back home to a stable routine and familiar setting.  They agreed that the additional tests being considered would not serve any real purpose.

While there were differing opinions by the two doctors and the Physician’s Assistant, two out of three felt that there was no compelling reason to expect more vulnerability to Congestive Heart Failure than there has been since the first bout five years ago.  We are going to return to our pattern of life to the degree the dementia will allow.

Mary Ann decided to go to bed at 5:30pm this evening. She has been up and down a a few times already.  Of course, I won’t know how tonight will go until morning.

I had mentioned in passing to one of the nurses that I appreciated having all the folks at the hospital with the care recognizing that Mary Ann and I would pretty much be on our own to deal with the aftermath when we got home.  I suspect she mentioned it to the Social Worker at the hospital who came in to talk with me before we left.  It is the norm that a Hospital Social Worker will check to see what if any needs there might be when a patient goes home.  This time the questions indicated some extra effort at listening to our situation.

The Social Worker mentioned that the nurses had spoken well of the care being provided Mary Ann.  Since I am no longer in a role that provides opportunity for external validation it was especially meaningful to hear those words of affirmation.  The Social Worker seemed to feel very good about the support system we have, from family and the congregation.  She sees folks who have little or no support as they try to care for a Loved One.

The day tomorrow is a full Wednesday.  It will be interesting to see how Mary Ann does with all that will go on.  I am going to continue our activities based on the assumption that alertness and the ability to track will return and the hallucinations will diminish. It that improvement does not come, we will adapt.  It is what we do.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

 

 

November 2, 2009

To the Hospital We Go!

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This is one of our most dreaded experiences.  Mary Ann felt some chest discomfort after a long nap Saturday afternoon   We had returned home from Eureka Springs Friday late in the day.  We were in the car when she mentioned the discomfort.  I gave her a Nitroglycerin pill (sublingual) and we drove to the next stop to give it a chance to work.  It did not seem to help.

She described the pain as a heaviness in her chest rather than a sharp or focused pain.  I recognized that as the Congestive Heart Failure sort of description of discomfort.  We stopped at the house to pick up a couple of things and headed off for the Emergency Room.

Sure enough, she was in heart failure.  There was Pulmonary Edema, fluid build up in her chest.  There also were slightly elevated heart enzymes which could indicate a heart attack of some sort.  The blood tests since then have indicated that there was not a heart attack, just the Congestive Heart Failure.

She was admitted so that they could go through the normal series of tests to check things out.   Of course, since it is a weekend, any tests other than xray and blood tests need to be done on Monday.

Hospital stays are dreaded not because there is something wrong with the hospital or the staff.  One problem is that the complexity of Mary Ann’s cluster of problems and the many medications taken at very specific times are hard to handle with rotating shifts and rules that are constructed to cover any liability for mistakes. That complexity demands my staying with her in the room 24/7 until she goes home.

As usual, she was up the entire first night.  And, of course, so was I.  Gratefully, she did sleep much of the night last night.  I had anticipated being up all night every night, so getting some sleep last night was a treat.  Of course there were very many times during the night that vitals were taken, blood was taken, and various other activities woke us up often.

Getting the meds from the hospital pharmacy is tedious and frustrating.  There are patterns that need to be followed that sometimes result in the timing of pills changing in ways that don’t make sense in terms of the result that is sought from taking them. The staff has been willing to accept my input, making that issue less of a problem.

The doctors are tugged in so many directions with emergencies often tying them up for long periods of time (a good thing for those having the emergency) that there is no knowing when they will come in for the report, to answer questions and give instructions.  As a result those of us who are Caregivers have to remain in the room until they arrive — no matter when in the day that turns out to be.

This morning we are waiting for the doctor to tell us if Mary Ann will need a heart cath (unlikely at this point).  Just in case the test is to be done, she can have no food or drink.  It is after 9:30am (10:30am according to her body clock since the time changed yesterday) and she has been begging for food or drink since about 6:30am.  She was pretty tired and unresponsive yesterday, so had very little food, only a couple of snacks.

One of the most difficult problems to negotiate at the hospital is that the combination of the stress, lack of sleep, medication changes, and the changed routine results in lots of confusion.  The hallucinations increase.  There have been lots of people in the room (not actually here), needles, threads, water, and just a few minutes ago, a ten dollar bill on the floor.  After confirming that it was not there, I suggested that she keep working on that one and make it a twenty.  She immediately responded “greedy.”

Sometimes in the past she has gotten pretty resistant, sometimes unwilling to do what she is asked, sometimes pulling out tubes, getting almost belligerent.  This time there has been just a little of that, at least so far.  It has been manageable.

Our Son, Micah, came for most of the day yesterday, so I had a chance to go home and shower.  It was too bad she was not able to stay awake or respond much to him.  She still appreciated his presence.  They have a good time together.

I am pleased that there is wi-fi here so that I can check email and write this.  Last night the connection was going on and off so often that I never did get this finished and posted.  I was too tired to keep waiting for the connection to return, so I gave up and fell asleep.

That is all I will write for now.  We hope to be home soon, but will, of course, deal with whatever comes.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 29, 2009

Fourth Day: Still Doing Well in Hot Springs

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Finally!  Chocolate Wednesday!!

Yes, it began with a breakfast sundae.  It was not quite as decadent as it sounds.  The first layer was yogurt with home made granola mixed in.  Then came the strawberries, whipped cream and chocolate drizzled over the top.

Next came the plate with herb roasted potatoes, sausage patties and a breakfast strudel, which is a pastry shell filled with an egg and veggie center.  Who would have imagined such a thing?  It was wonderful!

The highlight was the Innkeeper’s 4pm table of treats.  The wines are always well chosen, red and white each day.  There were Halloween cookies, crackers and three kinds of cheese —  then, of course, the chocolate covered strawberries.  The chocolate was unusually rich and tasty.  The Godiva Chocolate Liquor with a touch of caramel was too wonderful.  It is good that liquor glasses are tiny.

The timing was perfect, since we had enjoyed a light midday meal a couple of hours earlier from the new in-house menu.  A chicken salad sandwich on a toasted croissant for Mary Ann, and bowl of tomato basil soup and a salad of field greens with a balsamic vinaigrette dressing for me.  It was served to us in the dining room where we could look out the windows and the gardens and the lake as we had a quiet meal.  The food here has yet to disappoint.

As we looked out the window, Mary Ann called my attention to the surface of the lake.  I have heard and used the word shimmering many times.  I now understand more fully what it means.  I guess it was the angle of the sun that combined with just the right movement of the water that produced almost blindingly bright sparkles on the water — as in diamonds, real ones.

Today was a spectacularly beautiful, warm and sunny day.  We sat for a while this afternoon on the patio by the fountain.  Mary Ann began reading a book she picked up at a Walgreen’s yesterday afternoon.  I read a bit from the Spirituality journal called Weavings.  Most of the time I just sat and soaked in the setting.

I had just a moment’s realization of the significance of our having this time sitting together.  There was a flash to a time that may come when sitting next to her will no longer be an option, when I may be sitting alone.  It was not a deep and sad feeling as much as it was an appreciation of what we are now able to enjoy.

As she read, I took some time to walk through the garden on the stone path that wound through the blooming Azaleas, going across stone bridges over the stream created by the fountain and waterfalls.  Some wonderfully colorful butterflies moved from blossom to blossom, a Monarch, a black Swallowtail of some sort, a yellow Sulfur butterfly.  There were lots of bees wandering in and out of the blossoms.  When I walked along the lake, there was a turtle  hovering at the wall.  It was just a very pleasant afternoon.

We have enjoyed meeting lots of folks.  One couple mentioned that their daughter’s wedding was just two weeks earlier.  She was married in South Carolina.  I asked where in South Car0lina she had been married.  They said something about Cliffs and Glassy, and we filled in the blanks.  Their daughter was married in the same beautiful little chapel in the mountains north of Greenville, South Carolina, in which our Daughter, Lisa, was married.

It has pretty much never failed that asking other residents at the B&B where they are from has initiated a conversation that produced some connection or commonality.  There are people here from a variety of places, some still working and attending conferences here in town, some retired.

If there was no other common ground, often the mention of being a retired pastor began the path leading to the discovery of something in common, or something of mutual interest.  Two are active pastors, another is the daughter of a pastor, another has a brother who is a Franciscan priest (just switched to Diocesan for the sake of getting a pension), one plays guitar at his large Cowboy Church in South Texas.  One shared a tragic story of the death of her Son-in-Law when her daughter was pregnant with their first child.  It is a reminder of the depth and breadth of the experiences that lie behind the faces of those we encounter.   It is good to be in a setting in which we are all moving slowly enough that we can take time to make some discoveries that allow us into each other’s lives if only for a moment.

Mary Ann is down for the night (I hope).  We will eat breakfast in the morning here, load the van and head for Eureka Springs to stay the night so that we won’t have too long a trip back.  There are storms predicted for the day both here and in Eureka Springs.  We will take our time and stop whenever we need to.

Again, we are grateful for some good days.  We can put them in the bank.  Tomorrow will bring whatever it will.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 26, 2009

First Travel Day Went Well

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I am at a computer in the business center at a LaQuinta motel in Shawnee, Oklahoma.  We put on CD’s of short stories.  They were a little strange, but kept our attention as we traveled.  It is a clear shot to Oklahoma City on an excellent Interstate with minimal traffic.  The Flint Hills remain a spectacular sight.  

The rest area at which we stopped had family bathrooms available.  What a Godsend!  My stress level plummets to nothing when I see that we have a family bathroom available rather than trying to find someone to guard the door to a busy women’s restroom while I help Mary Ann. 

It was wonderful to surprise good friend John by appearing at this door for the birthday open house on the occasion of his sixtieth.  I had sent the return comment card ahead in the mail since I wasn’t sure that this would all work out, and I wanted to mislead them into assuming that we would not be there for the open house.  Packing the car the night before actually worked.  We got off at a reasonable hour and made to his home within minutes of the start time of the open house. 

By the way, we were able to include a stop at the Braum’s Dairy Store in Blackwell, OK.   Mary Ann got two scoops of Butter Pecan — there is none better.   I had a two scoop Hot Fudge Sundae covered with salted pecans!  Just to make clear that we know the ice cream decorum — it was after twelve noon (by minutes).   All is well with the world!

It was a treat to see Peggy and reconnect after thirteen years.   I had the joy of being one of three pastors who officiated in their wedding.  After having such a clergy presence, they are assured of being stuck with one another for many years to come.  Somehow, I think they are okay with that!

A special treat was getting to see and talk with John’s Daughter, Hope.  Since I lived in their home for the first few months of my ministry in Bethany, Oklahoma (an inner suburb of OKC), I got to know Hope and Joel during their early years.  Hope was fiesty!  That, my friends, is an understatement.  She was always intriguing and someone to be reckoned with even as a child.  The energy and intelligence and drive were apparent from the outset.  She has turned into an engaging adult who is realizing all that potential — of which the pinnacle is about as cute and pleasant little twenty-one month old little boy as could be imagined.

There was one surprise for me.  After a time, Peggy came out with what was obviously a Christmas present, wrapped nicely, topped with a flat bow that was covered with dust, as in a well-aged bottle of vintage wine.  It turned out to be a Christmas present that they had gotten for me, wrapped and marked with my name in 1996!  By the time it was ready to be given, we had already moved away.  It just never found its way to me — until now.  It was a nicely framed wedding picture of John and Peggy, looking young and excited as they began a new life together.  The picture, of course included the three clergy who joined forces to set them on the right path.

While the folks who attended were from John and Peggy’s life after we moved away, one blast from the past was visiting with Barry, a fellow pastor — who is the consummate smart aleck.  What great fun to see him again and pick up with the bantering as if no time at all had passed.  Barry lost his wife only months ago after a long and very hard battle with diabetes.  This particular experession of the disease did its worst for almost as long as Mary Ann has been dealing with the Parkinson’s.  Pat lost her sight (for the most part) pretty early on.   Barry also has spent many years doing full time ministry and full time caregiving.  There is an instant connection among those who fully understand the dynamics of caregiving from the Caregiver’s perspective. 

After a stop at a Denny’s, eating too much food packed with unhealthy carbs, we have settled in at the motel.  Shawnee is about an hour closer to Hot Springs than John and Peggy’s home in Edmond.  We will not have to drive in any of the OKC city traffic tomorrow.  The balance of the trip should be pretty manageable — although I would not presume to predict how well tomorrow will go.  I am just grateful that we have made the first day without serious problems. 

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 24, 2009

Stuck at Home Today

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The toast was just out of the toaster with a little Mayo on it.  The Provolone and smoked turkey had come from the fridge.  The bacon was warm from having just been cooked to just the right crispness in the microwave.  The sandwich was still sitting in front of her, untouched, after I had made some more bacon and toasted a slice of bread, topped it with butter, peanut butter and jelly for my own supper.

I asked what was wrong — why she had not touched the sandwich sitting in front of her.  She said it was frozen.  There was another time not too long ago when she said the same thing about a sandwich I had made for her.  Of course I did the opposite of what should be done when hallucinations mix into reality.  I complained in frustration as I took it to the microwave to heat it up for her.  I complained that I have no power to fix what isn’t there — it was impossible for it to be frozen.  When I asked what led her to believe it was frozen, she said there was ice on it — again, impossible.

While I should be past letting these things cause frustration, it is true that it is impossible to fix what doesn’t exist.  It is already using up all my coping skills dealing with what is real.  Dealing with the challenges all day and all night (sometimes) creates a very thin veneer of equilibrium.  My frustration came and went in moments, and Mary Ann ate about a quarter of the sandwich — followed by a cookie (no wonder she stays so thin even with trips out for ice cream).

Today also included lots of trips caused by some intestinal activity — not always making it in time.  Gratefully, the disposable underwear makes that occasional incontinence easier to handle.  This was a day the role of waste management was exercised.

One of the complications was that the esophageal spasms flaired up today.  When they come, there is much discomfort that lasts for hours.  This attack lasted most of the day.  I have been to the Gastroenterologist and been tested in every way known to humankind.  There is pretty much no real explanation and no treatment.

One of the routine challenges of any Caregiver is the need to continue to deal with the needs of another, no matter how small those needs may be, even when the Caregiver is sick and in pain.  It just comes with the territory.

Since last night was not a particularly good one in terms of uninterrupted sleep, we were both tired.  As a result, Mary Ann napped for a long time, and I vegetated, trying to ride out the spasms.

Mary Ann is in bed now and seems to be sleeping.  I will, hopefully, not be far behind.  I am sure she will need one or two snacks during the night since there was little consumption of food today.

Two updates:  No raccoon visitation last night either.  We will see what tonight brings. The other update is that I have managed to avoid any exercise walking the last two days.  Tomorrow is another day.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 23, 2009

A Good Day. Visitors from England.

Posted by PeterT under Daily Challenges, Help from Others, Meaningful Caregiving, Practical Tools for Coping, Therapeutic Activities | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |
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Robin and Margaret are such a joy to be around.  They are cousins to Mary, a good friend, as well as the one who gives so generously of her time scheduling Volunteers to be with Mary Ann.

While it seems impossible that it has been so long, it was seven years ago that they were here last.  We joined them for dinner at Mary’s home the last time they visited.  It is so refreshing to talk with people who see the world as the place where we all live together.  They have tried to make a major trip each year to places like India, China, and places whose names I don’t remember.  Of course they often visit Europe.  Robin described a breathtakingly beautiful spot in Austria where they visit extended family.

Talking with them sparks an awareness that we are citizens of the world, not just our city or state or country.  To talk about a sunset brings to Robin’s mind images of strkingly contrasting colors in the sky ten thousand miles from here.

I shared coffee cupping experiences.  I ground beans from the Gombe Project in Tanzania — of course, grinding them in the burr grinder and making the coffee in the Technivorm coffee maker from Holland — brewing at 200 degrees, waiting for the coffee flavors to bloom in the hot water before breaking the crust of the brewing grounds and only then allowing the coffee to drip through at a slow pace into the thermal decanter.

Robin talked about their monthly wine tasting parties at which they try to guess from where the wine they are tasting has come.  He loves surprising them with wines from places that would never be imagined to produce good wine.

We shared some of the freshly pressed apple cider from the Louisburg Cider Mill we had visited earlier in the week.  A couple of days ago I went to a local coffee shop, whose baker is especially gifted, and bought a dozen cinnamon raisin scones.  We had the scones with the freshly brewed Gombe Project coffee.  While the scones were quite different from the English scones, Robin and Margaret seemed to enjoy them.

Margaret was excited to see the red squirrel feeding on the back deck.  She was thrilled with the Blue Jay that came by in his fresh winter look after the late summer molting.  It was fascinating to talk about the birds and discover just how different the birds are that frequent our respective feeders.

Mary Ann was doing very well, and clearly enjoyed the conversation even though she was not able to participate fully.  It was a good day that we both enjoyed.

An update on the raccoon relocation project:  The trap was out, set and baited the last two nights, but there was no sign that the raccoons visited the deck either night.  There were rain and some storms both nights.  Maybe that discouraged them.  There is fresh bait tonight and no rain at the moment.  We will see what tomorrow morning brings!

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 21, 2009

Raccoon Trap is Set!

Posted by PeterT under Daily Challenges, Help from Others, Meaningful Caregiving, Practical Tools for Coping, Relationship Issues, Therapeutic Activities | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |
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Here we go again.  Tim says it is not Belle and the twins who have returned.  It is a new family that has moved in.  Tim’s conclusion is based on two things: One is that they could not have made it back from so far and crossed the Interstate to do it.  The second reason is that his reputation as a trapper extraordinaire would be injured if it were.

As expected, the return of the raccoons and the conversation about it has sparked Mary Ann’s expectations for seeing them in the bedroom at night.  When we arrived at the bed in preparation for lying down, she looked down to the floor along side the bed to see if she could see little feet — raccoon feet.

Assuming that we accomplish the goal, I can only hope that the trapping and relocating of this little raccoon family will remove that hallucination from the library. After we completed the task of trapping and relocating five raccoons a few weeks ago, while the hallucinations didn’t cease, there were fewer including raccoons.

Today continued to be a pretty good day.  Mary Ann did well at her morning Bible study group.  She spent much of the afternoon with a friend while I ran some errands.  They were on the deck for an hour or so on this beautiful day — something Mary Ann rarely does.  This evening another Volunteer/Friend spent a couple of hours with her.  It is especially satisfying to me when Mary Ann has had a good day and time with others.  It is tough for her to be stuck with me for long periods of time without a break.  Of course, I also appreciate the breaks.  Having time apart improves the quality of our time together.

By the way, that infernal Alien from planet Pedometer Prime that is trying to take over my body managed to send me outside to walk three times today!  This is crazy!  The little device he manipulated me into attaching to my belt says I took 17,581 steps today.  On top of that, the walks brought great pleasure since the day was spectacular.  What a devious plot this Alien is perpetrating.

Gratefully, so far I have successfully frustrated his consumption of my flesh.  By eating large quantities of meat and potatoes, chips, and sandwiches and anything else I can lay my hands on, I have reclaimed the a pound or two of the flesh that he had consumed in the last week or two.  Whew!  That was a scare.

The assessment of the condition of my body in preparation for the exercise and weight control program this Alien presence forced me to join was scheduled for tomorrow.  Maybe the power of the Alien is weakening.  The appointment was written down for the wrong day and had to be rescheduled to a day a couple of weeks from now.  Maybe I will be released from this evil possession before then.

I will report the progress on this round of the raccoon relocation project as soon as there is some.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

October 20, 2009

Good Quality Days — One Scary Moment.

Posted by PeterT under Daily Challenges, Help from Others, Meaningful Caregiving, Practical Tools for Coping, Therapeutic Activities | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |
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The weather was predicted to be spectacular today.  I wanted fresh cider and cider doughnuts from the Louisburg Cider Mill.  The drive is a wonderful one, lots of country scenery.  I warned Mary Ann early today of my plan.  She said okay.  Understand the Cider Mill is an hour and a half from our house.  I had in my mind that it was only an hour.

The plan was realized and we spent three hours on the road for a couple of cider doughnuts and a cup of cider.  We did bring back a dozen apples, a jug of fresh cider and some licorice, one of Mary Ann’s favorites.

Along the way, we got to spend a little time at a family farm tended by Doug and Marikay.  What a beautiful spot, fields, woods, a pond, and a newly built little cottage.

Saturday we had gotten to spend some time with our Son Micah, Daughter-in-Law Rebecca and Granddaughter Chloe, who live about an hour away in the Kansas City area.  We went to church with them and the ate with Micah and Chloe while Becky enjoyed time with a friend.

That quality time was followed by my Sunday morning trip to the Lake for a long walk on a newly discovered pathway, providing sights and sounds, entertaining descriptions posted on periodic stands, along with great weather.  Mary Ann enjoyed time with a Volunteer/Friend, who washed her hair and treated her nails, providing some refreshing personal care.

After a little football, we were treated to some creative and engaging arrangements of choral music and piano music by a talented composter/arranger named John Leavitt.  I had had the joy of getting to know him through an informal interview when the congregation I served was looking for a full time musician.  It was a pleasure to attend the concert/hymn sing at a local parish.  John has a remarkable ability to take something that could sound trite and tiresome from so much use and make it new and fresh.

The scary moment came just before we were to head out the door and leave for the cider mill.  We were returning from the pre-trip bathroom visit.  She had shifted into one of her eyes-closed modes as I walked her into the living room.  She was not moving well, so I asked her to stand still for a moment while I went the six feet or so to get the transfer chair and pull it beside her.

I saw it happening, but I couldn’t reach her to stop it.  The scene moved almost in slow motion as she move out of balance toward the end table, shifted direction, guided by the front of the couch and her head slammed against the back of an old wooden mission rocker as she cumpled to the floor.

For a moment, I thought this was the dreaded fall that would take her to the hospital, maybe producing a more damaging stroke than the last one.  I was sure, at the very least there would be bleeding that could not be stopped due to the regimen of Plavix and Aspirin.

I held her head and felt the knot.  There was no bleeding.  As I held her, I asked if it hurt terribly.  I was most interested in hearing if she could respond coherently.  To give her the words with which to respond, I asked the usual, “on a scale of one to ten” question.  At that point she said it was a nine.

I was just glad to hear her respond.  I held her for a while, then asked if she wanted a pillow so that she could rest on the floor before getting up.  She said she did.  While the norm would be to try to have a person stay awake after a head trauma, she was talking very coherently.  She had already, before she fell, switched into tired mode — usually followed by a nap.  I had asked her then if she wanted to nap, but she still wanted to go.  Now, as she lay on the floor, I thought she would need to rest for a while.  Already before she started her nap, she said that her head did not hurt any more.

The usual pattern is for her to sleep two hours when need for a nap hits.  This time she rested for less than an hour.  When I got her up from the floor, she decided that she still wanted to go.  That is when we left for the cider mill.

I have said it before.  I will say it again.  This woman is made of iron!  Twenty-two years of Parkinson’s, multiple heart attacks with two of the three main arteries on her heart completely blocked, a life-threatening bout of pneumonia, a stroke, the onset of Parkinson’s Disease Dementia (a Dementia with Lewy Bodies), flirting with stage 4 (of 5) Chronic Kidney disease, leaking heart valves, Pulmonary Hypertension, too many falls to count, and off we go on a three hour trip to the Cider Mill for a cup of cider and some cider doughnuts.

She will probably outlast me and end up dancing on my grave.  Yes, she still dances.

If you want to write a comment about this or any of the posts on this blog, look to the column on the right side of this page, titled “Recent Posts,”  click on the name of a post and you will find a box at the end of that article in which you can write a comment.  Clicking on the title of the post you are reading will accomplish the same thing.  Comments are appreciated.

 

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